migraine and recovery

Every day for the past three days, I've woken with a migraine that wasn't even hinted at when I went to bed. The first day I needed a second dose of meds before I could get serious relief. That was the barbiturate-based meds. (Fioricet) Since then, that's what I've taken. Today was bad again, and I was going to ask for more, but Otter came in and woke me up with, "You have a toasted cheese sandwich and this is all I can cope with making for your four pm pill food. It's five." This had me (slightly groggily) sit right up and start eating, while interrogating him about pain, and ending with putting one of my lidocaine patches on the part of his back that hurt, which he consented to because he'd run through every other pain relief he had for himself. Funny how awake I got suddenly.

I sent him off to put a heating pad on to get the chemical through his skin faster, and got on the computer. In the course of desultorily poking, I've become aware that *something* happened in Las Vegas in the past 24 hours, but I think I'm not going to go find out. I expect Otter will come tell me, with tears clogging his voice, as he's told me about various things in the past month, mostly involving hurricane relief and idiots in government.

I wish there was some way we could leave the country. This place has been a progressively greater shitshow since Bush the First got elected. I'm tired of adversarial politics, I'm tired of having worse and worse civil ambience, and I'm tired of feeling like there should be something I can do when I physically can't even move my fucking arm to reach the fucking mouse without feeling like there's a hot nail on my shoulder. Phone calls don't change that feeling.