khatru | Entries tagged with money

I'm not going to cuttag this because hiding it feels like I'm taking care of other people before myself. And that's part of why I don't post, I think, cause I'm doing nothing and feeling shitty and I don't want people to feel obligated to engage with that.

However, TL;DR: SocSec denied disability. Credit card says my check bounced, but went through on second try, $27 please. cobra sez my check last month bounced. finance guy never replied to text about a check from april that the creditor never saw that I want to stop payment. Good: Finance guy called back *at 10 pm*, went over everything I wrote last month. No reason anything should have bounced, I never went low enough in the account day by day to have bounced anything, 2(!) checks were "reversed" by the other side before going through (one was the above credit card), and the cobra check was never presented for payment.

So I've been having this bullshit going on with Social Security and me being declared disabled so I can get some quantity of income since before Otter died. I hadn't bothered to apply before that, because I figured it would just get bounced due to his income being high enough. The social worker assigned to his case since he was cancer and terminal told me that, once it was approved, it would get back-paid to the day I applied, which I hadn't known. So, application. Also, automatic rejection, acquire specialty lawyer, appeal, postponement, postponement, lawyer realizing that Otter died, different application, finally hearing, judge noting that first application superseded by second application, and since second application hadn't yet been evaluated, it hadn't been denied, and he had no standing to rule, good day sir. And 6 months later find out that that had killed *both* applications instead of just the superseded one, re-apply, aggravation talking to people, covid, delay delay delay, more paperwork, delay, until TUesday, when I got a call from lawyer saying it's been denied

Today I call back, having lost 2 days to migraines during business hours, and spend 45 minutes on the phone with the clerk with them filling out the appeals form.

Fortunately, Otter had a Huge Pile of Money in a) a life insurance policy through work, and b) state pensions from when he worked at Rutgers, and a 401k. While it took nearly 6 months to ACCESS THAT FUCKING MONEY, I have 85% of the 401k and about 70% of the pensions socked away into both an IRA for me, and a money market account, which is what I'm paying bills from. So, DESPITE HAVING NO INCOME, I'm not in any danger of being on the street. At the ass end of desperation, I have a 2unit house I could sell. Or, you know, tell the tenants I have to put the rent closer to market rate. (Which I don't do because a) one set of tenants are basically non-biological family, and b) the other set of tenants, their friends, are handicapped. And c) I'm a mensch.)

BUT I'D STILL LIKE TO HAVE SOME FUCKING INCOME CAUSE I'M PARANOID LIKE THAT.

So after talking to the nice law clerk about $SHIT (including all the ways which don't show up in their questionnaires that I am a non-starter as an employee, or even an independent worker with deadlines) I took some time to calm down (listened to the Nice Voice on youtube tell me inconsequential information while I keep my fingers and light levels of attention busy playing solitaire) I was about to open WoW, but decided that yes, it's AUgust 25, I should do the bills so I don't have to call the pay-by-phone system to pay them. Virtuous me!

(Yes, the date on this post, and indeed the date I'm writing it, is August 27.)

It wasn't till I was looking through my calendar to mark down how much money I paid out in doctor copays this month that I realized it was the 27th. Oh yeah, 2 days of migraines.

So after being aggravated at myself for about a half hour, I forced myself to settle down and do the page-markup I do for my bill ledger, to divide the two facing pages into 4 months worth of records. And I kept finding myself with my fists on the table and grinding my teeth. And it's 8:50, and I really should get these bills in the mail TONIGHT to make sure they get there by Sept 1. SO ok. Not gonna do pretty lines on paper, just do the bills and record them later.

So i start opening the bills, in order of a) importance and b) due by date. First up: COBRA. Why do I have 5 letters from them? In order of received: 1)"We received a partial payment for September. Here is the amended payment coupon for the rest of September." 2)"We received a partial payment for August. Here is the amended payment coupon for the rest of August." 3)"Your check #XXX in the amount of (total I pay per month) was declined for insufficient funds. Here is a coupon for August in the full amount you still owe us." 4)"Here is some legal information about when you have to pay your COBRA by, since there's COVID weirdness, and everything's extended and we don't know when it ends." 5)"We still haven't received your payment for August. If we don't have it by LAST DAY OF MONTH your COBRA insurance will be cancelled."

What the everloving actual fuckity fuck fuck fuck.

So I text the guy who oversees my finances, because I don't understand money shit and if I can offshore this I will. This is the guy who's done my inlaws money for decades, so even tho he's a bit smarmy and talks a lot about guns and other shit (which doesn't really bother me, I just wonder if he does that cause he thinks I got along so well with the family cause I was into it like my father in law). He usually at least texts back. I also see that I texted him earlier in the month about a check that (the Specialty Mail Order Pharmacy claims to never have received, that according to the records I could dig up,) was never cashed, and how do I stop it and how much would it cost.

And then my Elder Child comes up with food, and I rant at them for a bit, and realize that a) I'm probably having a panic attack, because b) WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED TO MY MONEY AND I CAN'T PAY BILLS WITHOUT KNOWING THAT. Hopefully *they* have calmed down from the anxiety about WTFMONEYBILLSAAAHHHHH So I realize it's been an hour, and I text FinanceGuy again, apologizing and explaining, and get a text back, "I'll call you as soon as I can login."

And this is where he earns his money. He called me back, at 10:15 at night, and went over every transaction that happened wrt my bills. A) The COBRA check WAS NEVER PRESENTED FOR PAYMENT. B) My check to one of my credit cards was "reversed" (he doesn't know why that happened) and then presented again, and paid. C) my check to the water company was also "reversed", and then presented again and paid. D) At no point in the month did my balance dip low enough for EITHER of them to be declined.

AND when I looked at my current statements from that credit card, and the water company, the credit card is dinging me $27 for having to present it a second time. The water company has no information about that on the statement.

He's going to check with his assistant tomorrow, to see if there was some sort of glitch on their end that might have fucked things up, and get back to me. I'm also going to call COBRA company and a) find out wtf is going on with 'latest day to have money by' and b) WTF DECLINED WHEN NOT EVEN PRESENTED FUCKERS.

But, right now, I'm typing here, and then going to pay WoW. Because I don't have anything to throw that won't break and make me sad, and I don't want to damage the walls cause I don't want to have to deal with them being painted again.

And I'm still wanting to scream.

Current Mood: screaming
Current Location: Home-Den
Current Music: a/c
Crossposts: https://khatru.livejournal.com/34101.html

I've been doing a lot of stuff that doesn't look like much.

Conversed with R about $THINGS. The primary thing coming from that is that we're moving up the timeline on househunting. Since I want to have overlap between getting a new house and selling this one so that I'm not frantically trying to pack, and the main reason I was setting it off 1-2 years was so that C would have a geopolitically appropriate address for his school, we can disconnect looking/moving and C's address need, and just leave him in the house on his own for a bit. So now I'm actually looking at the not-quite-spam mail that I'm getting from the three websites, and have brought R in to the ONE that lets you connect someone in (WHY IS THIS NOT A GENERAL THING???) and we're leaving comments for each other on houses.
Three of us went to a set of 3 open houses this past Sunday. First one was a house I wouldn't offer on, because it doesn't have the minimum accessibility I would need, but it was very local and a good learning experience. I also proceeded to inform the people manning the open house exactly why I wouldn't offer for it (there was much more than just the lack of accessibility, such as the complete lack of insulation in the attic, with sunlight visible in multiple places under the eaves). Second one, the people who were opening the house failed to show, it being after 2pm on a 1-4pm open house. We left. Third house was up in Bloomfield, move in ready, with some oddments that all older houses have (like, why was there a deadbolt on the door between the kitchen and the basement?) and all the accessibility I'd need. However, parking is minimal, and there are things (like one of the sets of steps from the house to the back yard is in the way of getting anything large *to* the hatch to the basement) that means that it's probably not actually the right house for us.
I had a week+ of doctor visits, that ended up with a small twinge in my back that I've had since about 2 weeks after Otter died flaring wildly. Paindoc thinks I might have gotten another compressed nerve, wants to MRI, and agreed to wait till I got insurance. That pain hasn't quite settled down, and is affecting my ability to do much. I've also felt lower energy since Sunday and the three open houses where I was walking around on uneven ground (looking around the houses) and doing stairs.
I came downstairs this past Monday to do bills and stuff, and was so out of it that I didn't even realize it was after 7 before I actually got moving on paper/mail intake until I was suddenly handed dinner. I meant to come down yesterday, and failed, ending up taking migraine meds, and extra pain meds. Today I woke up at midnight (top fo the day) and fell asleep again at 7, barely managing to eat food and take morning pills; ended up taking an extra pain med some time later; woke up just before 4pm pills, and dragged myself down here to at least do bills if not the phone calls, only to find that the fucking ATT bill is not here yet. *sigh*
Exiting Housemate has slowed down her exiting, due to her own health issues. Completely reasonable, but I'm getting antsy to have stuff gone. It's at the point where it's mostly just stuff to be put in trash and recycling, and I'm beating my head against C to do that, because R is doing EVERYTHING ELSE and we're really done.
To the point where R caught a cold (or something, it apparently came on faster than usual) and was sleeping a *lot*. A bunch of takeout later, a bunch of barely-touch-into-the-oven later, a few Inform-C-he-was-cooking-and-could-just-be-pissy-if-he-wanted-but-that's-it meals, and R took some money and slept in a nearby hotel for a few nights so that the allergen load would be less/different. Also, finally went to doc even tho temp never got over 101, and was given antibiotics anyway cause former smoker.
The kids, finally, after literally 2 weeks of nagging, moved the Forester out from underneath the dangling slate.
Finding a roofer to take on our roof has, again, been special, with 1 ghost on an estimate, 1 'you'll hear from us in a couple of days' that turned into two phone calls and a voice message later saying, "yeah, we do slate but not jobs that big" (WTF?), 1 semi-reasonable estimate, and 1 that said 'you need a whole new roof'. We have the lower estimate for the small roof that was damaged by the tree set to happen next week, and then we work from there, I guess.
May is the first month that I'm paying bills out of the account made with the life insurance money. Of course, the car insurance 6month is due this month, and the house insurance is due June 1, so there's going to be a huge dip to start with. Hopefully financial guy won't get nervous. :D
The car insurance customer service guy actually called late last week - later than he had said, but he *did* call back. Apparently C's good student discount is valid for, at least, this cycle of insurance payment. Yay! $2900 for 6 months is annoying as fuck.
I think that's all.

Contemplate agitating at ATT to change billing date.
Try to take Skitty to the vet for checkup when C is home.
Do more of the stuff that needs to be kept up with.
Find out when annual taxes are due
Arrange to actually get the roof fixed. IN PROCESS
call tax assessor office 9a-3p Barbara 9087692906 AFTER 12:30 WEDNESDAY as of 20180208
Decide day of month I need to pay bills. (2 days before end of month is not enough time)
Clear out envelope of Bills Since Death and sort into records, bills, whatever.
Figure out what to do about cpap machines (company emailed back, saying donate or whatever) (in process)

Talk to R about:

Container specifically for estate stuff. - Catbag?
Container for my paper notes on phone calls.
Container for medical records current year, bills and other
Container for keeping records, current year (currently back half of step sorter that R got from Staples, and repurposed wire mesh phone stand)
Container for medical records specifically for past years.
Containers for keeping records for past years, to hold paid bills and record keeping.
Container for tax info papers bundled by year for past years.
Container for my frustration and sanity. (Research ongoing. Last marble was found in dice bag, perhaps something similar?)

Crossposts: https://khatru.livejournal.com/28195.html

Woke up at midnight for my midnight food/pills, from a dream where I was trying to solve an epic quest, possibly with other people, and all the NPC ish people were no longer able to help us. We had to remove some bodies ?alive? from laying over other things protectively, and they were large and heavy and resisting, and we were down to the last one and I realized my cat was sleeping on my arm and I had to go to the bathroom. *sigh*
Woke up again about 10am after about 6 hours of sleep, and realized I was actually awake. So I texted R that I wanted to go out Notary Public hunting today, to be able to mail off the form for TIAA to give me Otter's pension. There were more dreams, but I didn't retain them.
Called TIAACREF to ask how long it will take to get the money once they get the forms. "5-7 business days." I'll believe it when it happens.
Called the person who had called me about owing money to the doctor group that Otter had apparently been paying $200/month to that I had no clue about until she called me as another phone number available to bug. I got the payoff number from her, made that check out and stuffed it in an envelope to mail while we were out.
Looked for the paperwork to turn the Merrill Edge account over, and couldn't find it. Sent the contact person an email owning my flakiness and asking for a new set of paperwork.
Went to the bank we started up the account with in December, and asked if they had a notary. They did, the guy who did the paperwork to start the account, who was happy to see us and just did his notary thing.
Went to the post office and sent the thing off for that pension fund certified mail, to get a return receipt.
Came home and did bookkeeping reconciling banking and making sure my checkbook was up to date.
Called the 401k plan company to find out how long it would take to get their money. After a bit of circling around with her trying to get her system to agree that I was me, ended up finding out that they have the two checks - one money for me, one money for the IRA I'm starting up, in the mail today. Wooo!
Culled through the things that have accumulated under the cut, and I've basically finished all of them. I'll include them above the cut this time. Go me!
Checked the mail, and nothing important was there. The most convenient branch of the bank that my mom's house account is with is closing, which is annoying, but no bills or anything else.
Received a phone call from the lawyer in Florida who is dealing with my aunt's estate. We started talking and then he sounded like he couldn't hear me, and then hung up, and rejected my callback. WTF-ever.
Went Upstairs To Play WoW!

Arrange to actually get the roof fixed.
call tax assessor office 9a-3p Barbara 9087692906 AFTER 12:30 WEDNESDAY as of 20180208
Decide day of month I need to pay bills. (2 days before end of month is not enough time)
Clear out envelope of Bills Since Death and sort into records, bills, whatever.
Figure out what to do about cpap machines (company emailed back, saying donate or whatever) (in process)

Talk to R about:

Container specifically for estate stuff. - Catbag?
Container for my paper notes on phone calls.
Container for medical records current year, bills and other
Container for keeping records, current year (currently back half of step sorter that R got from Staples, and repurposed wire mesh phone stand)
Container for medical records specifically for past years.
Containers for keeping records for past years, to hold paid bills and record keeping.
Container for tax info papers bundled by year for past years.
Container for my frustration and sanity. (Research ongoing. Last marble was found in dice bag, perhaps something similar?)

Crossposts: https://khatru.livejournal.com/27493.html

Called COBRA Management company, to get my account details since I had misplaced the piece of paper I had written them on. I was told that the only record of me in the system was as his dependent, that he is listed as 'terminated' and not 'deceased', and this is incorrect and must be dealt with. I took a case number, and left them to deal.
Emailed Otter's HR to tell them of this, and that something is very confused.
Was told by R what the details of the account were, and successfully got into the COBRA management company's benefits account to continue to elect COBRA for my health insurance. Only to find that, having listed Spouse&Child as needing insurance, I *must* include the Primary Plan Participant in the insurance, and that doing so has the wrong number of people being insured. Apparently because Otter is NOT listed as deceased, things are SERIOUSLY upgefukt.
Called COBRA management company again and confirmed that yes, this is the reason it is all upgefukt, and they need to talk to Otter's employer and get things straightened out, and that it will take 3-5 business days, as it always does. Oh, and that another company will be the COBRA management company on April 2nd. Yes, I know, I called them 2 days ago and they said to complete the coverage with you folks.
Screamed for about 2 minutes straight, and then took many deep breaths.
Spent time trying to figure out who has our tax info from the cryptic note left by Otter on his computer for me. Even accounting for his atrocious spelling, I can't find anyone with any name anything like the names he wrote down that has ever heard of him, or our 6+ years of unfiled taxes.
Spoke with R about the various research projects I'd given her: our food spending is consistent on a monthly basis so we can work on that number as our budget; the post card from our local mazda dealer talking about a recall doesn't have one that is dangerous that we seem to be affected by; the insurance company that was dealing with the tree that came down on our roof had gotten back to her about when the check was cashed, cleared, and other identifying information, and that information was not found in our records.
So I Called up his bank and asked if they could find that information for us, to confirm that it was cashed by him. They said yes, but we'd have to come in person to talk about it.
Went to Otter's bank (where I now have a couple of accounts) and talked to them, and yes, indeed, that check was deposited into his account. Yay. So much for that 2k.
Did some Ingressing while driving around.
Went to BJs with R, doing some price comparing and picking up some pens that I love that are really inconsistent as to where I can find them, and these were 10packs of the matching pen and pencils. In addition to the groceries.
Had pizza for my 4pm food next to Stop & Shop.
Sat in the car while R went into Stop & Shop, because she wasn't going to be long enough for me to get in any cruising for interesting things, and she doesn't like the scent of lilies.
Came home and Called the lawyer in Florida who's taking care of my father's sister's estate. Talked to a person this time!!! But not the lawyer. He's out. But now he's it!
pored over the TIAACREF pension beneficiary form, and grepped through papers failing to find the information for the new IRA for me.
Got called into the kitchen to help R butcher a chicken. (I'd given verbal directions before, but this was eyes on while she wielded the knife.)
Found another set of papers with the account number of the new IRA for me, and used that to fill out the TIAACREF paperwork.
Called TIAACREF help line to figure out some confusing back-and-forthing in the form to fill out. (Mostly my confusion, less their writing, and making sure I understood that really, I didn't have to write anything on 4 pages of this.) (I wrote "DO NOT NEED" on them just to be clear.)
Proudly signed it only to realize that I should not have signed it because it needs a notary and I'm supposed to sign in front of the notary. Fuck.
Put it down to deal with tomorrow because I've been up for 19 hours and I'm done.

Not including the other stuff. Done.

Crossposts: https://khatru.livejournal.com/27212.html

The COBRA management company claims that Otter is listed as eligible for COBRA because he was terminated, not deceased. This is causing bloody hell with me trying to elect COBRA.

Furthermore, there will be a new COBRA management company as of next week. I had called them on Monday to ask if it made more sense for me to wait to elect COBRA until they are the company or if I should do it now and the person I spoke to seemed rather flustered and said I should definitely elect it before it got to them and let the system pull things over.

Current COBRA management company has '3-5 business days' for their resolution of issues.

*headdesk**headdesk**headdesk*

Crossposts: https://khatru.livejournal.com/27109.html

Beginning of boring stuff I did post.

- There were, indeed, things I needed to sign inside the envelope I got that I opened, identified was paperwork about the IRA they're setting up, labeled IRA STUFF and put aside for later. Oops.
- The 401k hasn't shown up yet for them, and in fact is most likely going to show up in my mail as a check made out to the IRA fund. So I should be looking for that Real Soon Now.
- Astonishingly enough, he agrees with my intention for the money, that I should clear all bills before putting things away. Woot!
He's going to be at my FIL's 90th birthday party this upcoming Saturday. He'll have paperwork for me to sign and I need to be ready to give him a check for however much I'm not using to pay off stuff. This is going to be the *liquid* ish portion of my funds. I've never had this much money before. I don't think my family (parents and up) had equivalent-this much money before.
Called Wells Fargo Mortgage: The Deceased Processing Unit (is this anything like food processing?) had to give me to Customer Service (which I had actually dialed originally, and killed it and called the Deceased Processing Unit instead...) and gave me a number that's good till the 30th. And it's $4+ interest for every day past that. This is not a legally binding number; they can mail, fax, or email a number that would be legally binding. No, they cannot guarantee that if I give them my email they won't use it for advertising purposes. So I have to get a certified check, and send it overnight to a really whacky address to get this done.
While I was waiting on hold, I emailed Otter's HR person to let them know I'd gotten the life insurance check, and ask she had any idea of when I could expect to get anything from the 401k folks.
Called the Credit Union about the home equity loan: They're ok with a personal check. I have the number to be paid off by Friday, and I can walk it in (or spend the money to get it there by Friday).
Called the House Insurance to find out how/what to pay/do now that mortgage is being payed off. It's paid through May, renews June 1. I have #OPTIONS about how to pay, and time to think about it. Yay!
I sent email to the lovely friends who loaned me money for mortgage, and asked them for their accounting of how much I owe them.
I called what will be the new cobra management company (yes, for the insurance I haven't finished filling out the applications for) and found out that they aren't doing any intake, I have to finish the filling out with the current company and let it flow over with the transfer.
And I made out a couple of checks for bills while on hold with all of those, and then R and I went out to do EXTREME BANKING!
Went to local bank and got a certified check (aka cashier's check, aka treasury check) in the amount of "I don't think I've ever sent this much money before" (plus $10 for the service)
Went to local post office and followed the directions of the Lady In Charge to send it overnight. It should be there by noon on the 27th. That will be $24.07, thank you very much.
On a roll, we drove over to Busch Campus to pay off the home equity loan we had at the credit union. This took a while, since it was about 2:30-3pm as we went, and school was letting out all over the place.
To celebrate the hemorrhage of "I haven't ever spent this much money in one day" we ... spent more money, and had a treat at Thomas Sweet's (excellent store-made ice cream).
We discussed dinner on the way home, and decided that sushi was far more interesting than leftovers, and that it was the better part of valor to order in than eat at a restaurant. I had another errand vaguely in mind, but decided to let it slip.
Called the oil company to find out why they were trying to charge the oil delivery to our credit card when I had arranged in January that they would no longer do that. Apparently that information never made it into our file, and hopefull will now be in our file.
Between getting home and ordering dinner, I wrote out more checks for bills for normal amounts of money, and succumbed to the demands of the cat so lonely because no one ever pets her to be a mattress.
After we ordered dinner, I called Otter's insurance company, following up on the call I made on March 5th about getting the claims adjustment check re-issued in my name. Turns out there's a note, saying they called on 3/6 and left a message. Apparently they called the house phone, and I don't know who they left a message with. I found out that I need to send them a copy of the surrogate's affidavit naming me It, and got the address to send it to. Again, this took a while of me being on hold for this to be figured out.
Ate delicious sashimi from a new place. I'm not sure it was any less expensive than going to a restaurant would have been. :/
Called the insurance company from 5 years ago to talk to them about getting another check reissued (that we'd just found this past weekend, which had been reissued Sept 28, 2017 and was good for 6 months, with no indication of when the original check had been inssued). This took over an hour of talking with someone (who at first couldn't find a record of the check in their system...) and being on hold, and talking to them, and being on hold... and eventually they decided that I could sign a HIPAA release that would give me the right to see his information, and that would give me the right to get the check in my name. (Does anyone else see the circularity of the logic here?) They emailed me the form, I printed it out, filled it out, and in the process found that I needed to give them ... a copy of the death cert and the surrogate's affidavit. *headdesk* Soooo, I included those also.
There was something else I did, but I forgot.

( all the stuff for the future that's nearly the same in every post )

Crossposts: https://khatru.livejournal.com/26770.html

And... now that I have that, my feelings of stasis have lifted. Now I just have to get up during the day.

The *really* boring posts will restart, now.

I've *already* mailed the check to almost-kill the credit card. I left some loose, cause I've been told credit reports get really weird if you don't have any credit floating about.

Next day I'm awake, I need to:
a) call the mortgage company and find out how much it will cost to kill the mortgage.
b) Call the home equity loan folks and find out how much it will cost to kill the HEL
c) call united healthcare and find out what happened to the check they were going to try to send me in some
form of my name instead of Otter's, so I can actually cash it.
d) call the Other Older Insurance company, about the check I just found from back in September, to get it
made out in some form of my name instead of Otter's, so I can actually cash it.
e) Call the FinanceGuy to see what *he* thinks I should do with the rest of the money, given my desires of
1) having a checking account dedicated to bills (so we don't end up bouncing bill checks due to buying
groceries)
2) having 2-3 years of taxes, and general bills available to me without having to worry where it's coming
from (monthly house bills, car insurance, house insurance, sewer (twice yearly), DMV moneys)
3) Get something more than generic savings account interest accumulating from it.
4) Oh, and did the money from the 401k plan ever show up?
f) Email HR person at Otter's company and tell them the life insurance showed up, now what about the 401k?

I also need to pay back the lovely friends who loaned me the money for the mortgage these four months. And then figure out how to buy groceries and gas in the meantime (That should be solved by FinanceGuy)

Yee. Haw. Oh, and get the roof fixed from LAST AUGUST's TREE that the insurance company claims we CASHED THE CHECK FOR and we have no record of it. Fucking shit, Otter, just DEAL WITH MONEY.