Stress

So my blood sugar has been high since (at least) January. My endo said, 'be better about taking your meds, and fix your diet' which was fine by me. In April, my numbers were better, tho still not good, and he was content with, 'gotta get better with your meds.' which was fine.

Then I was in the hospital in June, and my numbers were completely whack, and even tho everyone said "yep, infection will do that, and so will antibiotics" they still gave me insulin and the hospitalist went all interventionist on me till he actually thought to look at my back records (which he could do cause he's part of the same medical group I go to) and was suddenly very relieved that I wasn't lying about 'no really, my numbers were fine for a while' and let me go with 'i'll see my endo in july when I have an already scheduled appointment'. But they still insisted on giving me insulin, and I didn't feel I had a lot of argue room since my bg numbers were over 300.

And then my father in law went into the hospital for 5 days, and I was scrambling back and forth to see him, and my gut was being all gassy, and wheeeeeeee.

And it occurs to me that I've basically had, at least, 7 months straight of stress, starting with the downhill slide to Otter's death, and then the life insurance, and cobra, and shit. And that's not counting the 17 months from diagnosis to death.

Since I got out of the hospital, my self-tests haven't been under 220. And I don't know if I'm going to get tossed on higher dose of metformin - which already fucks with my bowels - or something else, and I've heard vague grumblings about 'getting addicted to insulin' which I can't tell if it's people being fucked in the head about it or if there's an *unnecessary* physical dependency thing going on at times. (Yes, I know, insulin is necessary, and it's like being addicted to air, at least for Type1. I don't know about Type2.)

vent vent vent stress stress stress breathe breathe breathe

This post brought to you by fasting overnight while stressing over WoW end of xpac achievements, followed by blood draw, 4 slices of american cheese to shut down the ravenous hunger and take my morning meds, with the pain meds that I have to have food with or I get nauseated, followed by a diner and sudden rush to the bathroom cause my bowels acted up, and chicken pasta soup, sliced steak, 5 french fries, 2 onion rings, half a milkshake and 2 bites out of a wonderful concoction of french toast, strawberries, bananas, raspberry syrup, something tat's not cream cheese, and I don't know what else; the website I found for them didn't work for me, even with turning off Privacy Badger which is the usual culprit. This is a yelp review for the wonderful concoction, Sky High Pancakes (I got the link by choosing 'embed link' and it's weird but I'm leaving it in for now: Read Cody C.'s review of Country Squire Restaurant on Yelp

Why is it that food that settles my stomach is high in carbs? Toast mainly...